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DmytroV on This week: make one answer easier to follow

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Writing

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Choose a short paragraph or speaking answer you wrote yourself. Read it once and identify the main point. Rewrite the first sentence so that point is clear, then check whether each following sentence supports it. Share your revised version and one sentence about what you changed. You can do this exercise here without a diagnostic or Pro subscription.

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DmytroV

· Edited

Clearer now. Maybe explain what would make drivers switch, like a reliable bus on their route, instead of repeating how many people it carries.
2

amara07

· Edited

Maybe: 'A commuter might leave their car at home if a frequent bus gets them to work on time.' Just keep it short or the paragraph starts becoming about bus services instead.
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